Never Whole
by Moonbeam-987
Summary: "I'll never be whole again without you" Derek trying to cope with Casey's death. ONESHOT: rated T because it just is...


**Hello the world and all who inhabit it! This is my first Dasey oneshot:) I was listening to _Thinking of You _by Katy Perry and this idea popped into my head, and I just had to write it! I hope you like it:)**

**Rated T because I just want it to be:)**

**Disclaimer: Must I really say it?**

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"_Derek!" she screamed, "Stop tickling me!"_

"_Not until you say you love me!" I said as I tickled her ribcage._

_Her hair fanned out around her on the grass swayed back and forth in the wind. Her blue eyes glistened in the sun and I was mesmerized._

"_Ok, ok! I l-l-love yo-o-u-u!" she said in between gasps._

"_I love you…"_

"_I-I-I love y-y-you Derek V-V-Venturi! Now get off of me!"_

_I stopped tickling her and stood up with my hand extended to help her up. She grabbed my hand and pulled me back down to the ground as she got up and started running._

"_Casey! Come back!" I yelled as I got up starting to run after her._

"_You have to catch me first!" she said over her shoulder as she giggled and ran across the street._

"_Oh I w- CASEY LOOK OUT!"_

At that moment my life changed. It was the moment that Casey died. A truck came out of nowhere and hit her and there was nothing I could do about it. I was the one that she was running from. It's all my fault_._

The funeral was small, only the family, Sam, Emily, and a few more of Casey's friends. Everyone said their goodbyes and moved on with their lives, but I can't.

It's been five months, one week, and three days since the accident that took _my Casey_ away from me. Five months, one week, and three days since I dropped out of University. Five months, one week, and three days since I moved back in with my parents. Five months, one week, and three days since I have had a nightmare about _her _every night_. _Five months, one week, and three days since I've wanted to die.

I am a wreck, I know that. I know she would have wanted me to move on like everyone else, but I can't. I hate that everyone has moved on. They go about their days like Casey never existed. Even her own mother! I can't move two feet without breaking down. I wake up screaming every night because she plagues my dreams. I go in her room and just sit in her closet soaking in her vanilla-cinnamon sent praying that she will come in screaming and yelling at me because I'm in her room without permission. But she never does.

I will never again hear her scream at me. I will never again hear her sing her favorite song. I will never again hear her playing her piano in her room. I will never again see her smile. I will never again see her blush when I kiss her. I will never again watch her dance when she thinks no one is looking. I will never marry her. I will never have three kids with her like she planned. I will never celebrate a 50 year anniversary with her. I will never grow old with her. And it's all my fault.

It's all my fault that she will never do anything ever again.

Today, somehow I ended up at the cemetery. I don't know how I got here, and I want to go back to my car. But I can't. I can see her headstone and I can't stop moving towards it. My feet are bringing me to her, and I can't stop.

I'm standing in front of her headstone before I even realize it. It's a simple headstone with a purpley-pink tone to it, but nothing very extravagant about it. There are ballet shoes engraved on it and underneath are the words,

_Cassandra McDonald_

_1990-2008_

_Beloved daughter, sister, and friend._

Will forever be remembered in our hearts.

It is so Casey I can't even stand it. Tears start to well up in my eyes and I ball up my fists trying to keep them in. But I fail miserably.

"Why did you leave me Case? Why?" I scream at her headstone. "Why were you taken away from me? I love you! I can't do this anymore Casey. I can't sleep, I can't eat, I can't do anything without you!" the tears cascade down my face as I try to make sense out of this.

"Case, please come back to me." I sobbed into my hands. "You are still the only person I love, and that I will ever love. I'll never be whole again without you. Please answer me."

I never got an answer.

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**I hope you liked it! Please review, if you feel like it:)**

**Happy Holidays!:)))**


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